Better Than Grades

From my elementary days to my high school years, I used to be an achiever in my class. I never failed to be a class honor every grading period. I am also a former student government president when I was still fourteen. Moreover, I was the “top-or-fail” kind of student. Sounds familiar, right? However, to set standards for myself, I was used to cheating on examinations just to maintain my class standing. I am also used to compete with my classmates on major subjects. With this kind of attitude, I had limited number of friends. I pick them. If they were not smart and competitive enough, neglecting them was an easy decision on my part. All those years were my glory.

And everything changed when I studied here in Silliman University. I took Bachelor of Science in Accountancy as my preparatory course for law. The first semester of my first year turned out to be an advantage to me. I still got an academic scholarship at one point. And for me, the 3.0 above grade was my standard. However, I was still that “leather-shoe-shine-with-black-slacks” boy who never talked to classmates in class and dormmates inside the dormitory. The following semesters came when my major subject grades were now hiking down the ladder. At the end of my 2^nd year college, I failed to achieve the required GPA for the clustered subjects.

With this unexpected turn of events in my life, I felt I had been nothing. My parents even expressed their disappointment to me face-to-face. All the years I have gained and worked for were not of use anymore. I said to myself, “For what use is my achievements, certificates, medals, and all if I am not to achieve what I want to achieve at this point?” I have always dreamed of being called as, ‘Atty. Japril Diaz Cataluña, CPA’ -- the ever great, awesome, superior student. I have always dreamed of having not just good grades, not just better grades, but having the best grades. Nonetheless, these things aren’t realities anymore.

Then, that day came when I realized, I have just been living for myself and for my glory. It was just about me, me, and me. I forgot who I really am behind what I can do. I forgot who I am in God’s eyes. I realized that I have toiled and worked so much without God in my life. God told me that more than just what I can do, more than just good grades, more than just better grades, more than just best grades; a relationship with Him is the most important. God said that I don’t have to prove anything.

You know, I once thought that God would only accept me if I would present Him better grades from school. After shifting from accountancy to management, I have considered my grades not mine but of God’s. And better grades have never been better when we accept God’s better grades for us and it is a deep intimate relationship with Him.